Tess Conroy

   This is a good start on the first writing assignment.  
   You have done a good job, for the most part, on the 
   "they say" part.  

   I have made a number of suggestions for rewording
   or rewriting things directly on a printout of the 
   paper.  Ask me what I meant if the markings are not
   clear.  The main comment is that since you're using
   a quotation from the Greenbaum and Gerstein article
   in the first paragraph, I think you should introduce
   the title there.  Then the opening sentence of 
   the second paragraph could do more than just say
   what the title says.  I would say that they are
   claiming that the name ``Frankenfoods'' is unfair
   and misleading because it is designed to produce
   an emotional reaction of fear based on the associations
   with ``Frankenstein.''

   Comments:

   1.  ``Create the perfect crop'' is definitely too 
   strong.  And the rest of that sentence sounds an
   awful lot like an "I say" to me.  After all, I 
   wouldn't even say Laskawy is claiming that it is
   justified to fear them.  His main point is that 
   they haven't done what is claimed for them and
   they are only good for big agribusiness.

   2.  This is mainly due to increased resistance to 
   pesticides and herbicides that develops naturally 
   through evolution.  In effect, the genomes of the
   pests and the weeds are changing in response to 
   our genetic modification of the crops.  Some people
   compare the situation to an arms race where neither
   side can ever gain a decisive advantage.