Isabel Block -- Memory in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button

  Your essay is mostly very good as an examination of the role that memory
  plays in the connections between Benjamin, Daisy and Caroline.  You're right
  that Benjamin's diary ties them all together.  But you never really get
  much beyond recounting what happens in the film and there are places where
  you might have "dug deeper" and asked some other questions about the ways
  the direction of Benjamin's life affected how the action played out.  There 
  are also a few points that could be interpreted a bit differently.  

  Talking about Daisy's reaction to what she learns through the diary, you
  say, "This makes her smile because she understands the sacrifice he made to give 
  her a better life."  Eventually yes, but isn't her initial reaction one of
  feeling hurt?  The father she thought she had was not her actual father 
  and her actual father essentially abandoned her and her mother.  Remember
  the scene in the hospital when she comes to that point in the diary?
  And, by the way, was he really forced to do that? Wasn't that actually a 
  choice he made?  Did you think about why he had to leave when he did?  Would it 
  have been so bad if he had stayed around and let Caroline get to know him more 
  before he left?  Was it somehow influenced by the way his own father had
  abandoned him?
  
  In your last paragraph, you say "She [Daisy] is told the story of their epic 
  love and she is able to pass very ready and happily."  But isn't it more that
  Daisy feels she has this huge piece of unfinished business that she has to
  address with her daughter before she is ready to go.  She certainly feels
  some relief when Caroline learns about that part of her past, but "very 
  ready and happily" doesn't seem quite right to me.   

  Most of your writing here is quite good, but here are a few suggestions for
  improvements.  In the first paragraph, I think it would be better not to 
  explicitly ask the question "What would life be like without memories?" and 
  then immediately give an answer.  The answer you give "Life without memories 
  would be equivalent to starting each day without an identity." could really 
  stand on its own. 

  And by the way, this reminds me of another movie called "Memento" that you 
  might enjoy.  It's a dark story about a man who has lost the ability to form 
  new memories and his struggle to find out how his wife was murdered.  That movie 
  focuses on what it's like to start each day with no memory of the recent past.  
  It's really interesting and very closely related to what you are saying here.  

  At the top of page three, "Moving forward, they have a child together.  Her name
  is Caroline." is kind of choppy -- suggestion:  "Moving forward, they have a daughter 
  together and name her Caroline."  Later in that paragraph: "However, because of 
  Benjamin’s condition he was forced to leave Daisy and Caroline and let Daisy raise 
  her without him." sounds awkward.  I can tell you couldn't quite figure
  out when you had to use the names and when you could substitute a pronoun.  Don't 
  forget that it's possible to use a pronoun to begin a sentence, then indicate 
  the person it refers to later: suggestion:  "Because of his condition 
  Benjamin was forced to leave his family and Daisy raised their child Caroline 
  without him."  It's time to work on developing fluency and a more mature
  style in your writing.  

  Content -- B+

  Structure/Mechanics -- A-